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‘We didn’t see it coming, I had no idea my husband was going to kill himself’

Sad Teenage Girl

AN Enniskillen widow, recently bereaved by the death of her husband by suicide, spoke in harrowing terms of the impact his death had on her and their children.

The woman, who asked for herself and her late husband not to be identified for the sake of her children, said he was in his 50s and living in Enniskillen. For the last two years they had been living apart.

“We still communicated. I still loved him although we could not live under the same roof. In fact, we were getting on a lot better. Some people are just better apart.”

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As to the impact of his death, by shooting, she said she did not see it coming.

“We got the shock of our lives. We’re still coming to terms with it, still can’t believe it. No, definitely not, we didn’t see it coming.”

She explained she was on holidays at the time and she believes he had killed himself in his home two days before he was found.

“I got a phone call, asking if he was in an accident, that the police had arrested him. We knew he had drink on him because the police arrested him. We think he got himself into some state of depression.

“But, as far as we were aware, he wasn’t suffering from depression, definitely not. He was in the house for two days and nights and, even the second tonight, nobody was worrying about him, not even his boss.

“He was golfing with him (her husband) Saturday and Sunday and saw nothing and didn’t pay any attention when he wasn’t at work on the Monday.

“As I say, nobody saw it coming. It seemed to be when the police arrested him for drunken driving, he seemed to get himself into some state of depression, and killed himself, probably on the Sunday night.”

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At her request, her husband’s employer went to his home and found his body two days later.

“There was a note, just about 10 words.”

She then recalled what a counsellor who came to see her explained.

“She said anybody who does it on impulse, who thinks their life is over and goes and does it, that there will be alcohol or drugs involved anyway. In other words, they can’t think straight, people like my husband who don’t have it planned.

“My whole family has been through the house and, definitely, he never planned it.”

The woman hopes that readers will identify with her story and seek help.

“He was good to the family, but ours was a love-hate relationship and I have been living in another house for the last two years almost. But, we still communicated. I still loved him and I am still upset about it.”

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